Encouragement to Practice Completely

[00:00:00] Speaker A: For more information on Ancient Dragon Zen Gate, please visit our website at www.ancientdragon.org. our teachings are offered to the community through the generosity of our supporters. To make a donation online, please visit our website. [00:00:16] Speaker B: Good morning. I think there's an equal number of folks in the cloud and on the ground, and I don't think anyone is here for the first time, as far as I can tell. So seasoned dragons are here, and I don't think we've seen Nicole in the zendo for a little while, but online. And so you may have noticed this morning we celebrated the passing of Shakyamuni Buddha. And you know, this is one of some of the holidays that we Buddha holidays we celebrate here at Ancient Dragon. So in April, we'll celebrate Buddha's birthday. We get to adorn the Buddha with flowers, baby Buddha, kind of a little bit of a cheeky baby Buddha, and pour water over the Buddha and do some other things. That's in April. And then many of you were here for Buddha's awakening ceremony. That happens 8th day of the 12th month during Rihatsu Sashine in December. And then we have Buddha's passing on the 15th. And they're kind of easy to remember because if you come here for sashin and you do the meal chant, remember, Buddha was born in Kapilavastu, enlightened in Magadha, taught in Varanasi. That's turning the wheel of the Dharma. We studied that sutra first Sutra Buddha allegedly spoke that was in common circulation at his time. There were some others tucked away for future use and then entered nirvana. So we're at that stage, nicely displayed on the altar. At the end of his life, Buddha reclined on his deathbed on his right side under solitaries in a grove head supported by hand, and commenced a dying process. It was kind of a amazing hospice situation. Many beings were gathered around for this final teaching in this wooded grove. I really love the imagery of trees and Buddha's teaching, you know, awakened under a tree, born under a tree, died under a tree. And our trees are bare outside, but they'll soon protect us with their leaves, and they already protect us with their spirit. So some of the beings in this grove were like Buddhist disciples, celestial beings, lay people. It's often a large scroll of this parinirvana is taken out for this special day and hung in Buddhist temples. And in that you can see addition, in addition to people or humanoid figures, there are guardian deities that look kind of rough and fierce, celestial, all these celestial figures. And then there's things like horse, elephant. Might have been Buddha's like horse that he left home on or let go when he went home. I'm not sure. There's an elephant, often monkey birds, something that looks like a snake or a worm wiggling around. You know, the trees and flowers also appear to be, you know, grieving. It's quite a scene. And there's, you know, a bunch of versions of the final teaching of the Buddha and sometimes called Mahapari Nirvana Sutras or Maha Parinibbana suta, a lot of different versions, or at least a few common ones. But basically it said that Buddha's last words were something like, okay, now you carry on and do the practice. Realize it. Realize your own liberation in the truth of your life. Even says to his beloved attendant, Ananda, be islands unto yourselves, refuges unto yourselves, seeking no external refuge, with the Dhamma, the Dharma as your island, the Dharma as your refuge. Seek no other refuge. It's kind of sweet and encouraging. I think you have it now. You have this true Dharma teaching. Preserve it well. You know, after 45 years of teaching, wandering around, you know, without air conditioning in India at age 80, Shakyamuni realized his body was wearing out and felt his work was done. He says, what more does the community expect from me, Ananda, I've already set forth a complete teaching without making any of it hidden. Isn't that great? Like, I'm not, like, hoarding a little extra, you know, so that you'll come back and see me. I give everything. No holding back, no gaining agenda. So I think Buddha's life was like this complete effort of offering, non grasping, seeing something through till it was time to go. So today I really want to reflect on Buddha's final words and this effort or diligence in practice that is encouraged at the very end. Buddha encourages us to practice diligently. I think sometimes the final words are like the very final. Our all conditioned things are prone to vanishing. That means everything that we see, hear, touch, feel, think, arises and ceases, it's all going to go. All conditioned things are prone to vanishing. Practice with diligence. Work out your own liberation. Work it out. So in honor of this, these words, and of parinirvana, I invite you to consider, how do I practice with diligence? Do I practice with diligence? What is it? What is this practice? What is diligence? You know, according to Asian, I guess, astrology, cosmology. I don't know where the line is there. We've entered the year of the Fire Horse, you know, and this is supposed to entail a time of strength, action, and sudden change. And I think this is in that diligent practice is something like, be ready for whatever happens. Ah. I'll totally admit I know nothing about astrology and esoteric things, being more of an empiricist myself. But the image of the fire horse, full of this effort and strength, moving across through fire with fiery energy through uncertain terrain, is inspiring at this time for me. You know, I think sometimes we. We had a kind of a rough winter all around. No, it's what, 50 degrees almost today? But it has been cold, freezing, bleak, kind of relentlessly cold. And there's plenty to doom scroll like just a flood or a lot of people I know. Friend of mine just passed away Friday, you know, so there can be sadness and disappointment, kind of discouragement. I don't want to get out of bed and come to Zazen. I'm amazed you all found the energy to do that. Diligent energy, or at least something, some kind of energy. So in these last words of teaching community, Buddha says, practice diligently. Stay close to the Dharma. Stay close to the way things really are. In walking through this life, as Asia noted last week, our minds are swayed by views and conditions we can never know, grasp, or understand. You know, this human life is a murky business. To know our deepest truth and to live our deepest truth, which is, you could say, the Dharma in the midst of our everyday, normal situation of confusion within the limits of the conceptual mind. I think a buoyant energy is required, you know, the buoyant energy of the Dharma to support awakening, to not fall asleep or fall apart and just believe everything your mind is offering, your body is offering as some fixed truth, truth flows. So par. Nirvana is a good time to ponder diligence and the working of energy and effort as qualities of Zen practice, of Zen heart, of Zen mind. You know, sometimes Zen, you know, like, we Zen out, right? It's equated with, like, chillaxing or being soft or laxity or disengaged. You know, I'm so Zen, nothing bothers me. The more Zen I am, the more Zen I practice, the more I feel like crying or my body feels tender, vulnerable, uncertain. And I think this chillaxing Zen is a misunderstanding. Our way is total engagement. Total. And we don't even, you know, ponder that for a while. Total engagement with whatever happens. There's another version of the last teaching of Buddha that's popular in Soto Zen, and part of it reads monks. If you make diligent Effort, nothing will be difficult for you. Isn't that reassuring? What kind of effort is that? Therefore, you must practice diligently. Just as water flowing constantly can eventually wear away rock the hard self. But if your practice is lax, it's like trying to start a fire by rubbing two sticks together. If you stop before the wood gets hot, you can't start a fire. And then he says, this is called pure and relentless endeavor. So the teachings of Buddhism are. Are not really filled with laxity or chillaxing. You know, they are emphasize the importance of energy things, terms like right effort, virya paramita. Some of you are familiar with this enthusiasm to practice until we reach the other shore, until we have our own experience of complete liberation, sometimes called nirvana. You know, words like strength, heedfulness, resolve, pure, relentless endeavor. And another one I like called total exertion. Exertion with nothing extra. So I'll confess this talk was inspired by reflecting on this term about effort called total exertion, or translate it that way. When I've been looking over some comments by a teacher named Shinshu Roberts, Reverend Shinshu Roberts in Santa Cruz, who's written some books on Dogen's writing, including books on the time being or Uji essay, as well as Genjo koan actualizing the fundamental point. So I've been talking about. I just started just maybe like dipping a hair in the water. Not even a whole finger, but something in the water of this Genjo koan. But I came across this term on Thursday morning. So I. I want to just also like appreciate Shinshu Dogen Thursday morning. You know, I'm not even giving this dharma talk. They all are, so. But they offer. The Dogen offers this term especially in Uji, but other places, total exertion. And one way people have written about this total exertion in our way of practice is pretty wonderful and worthy of some contemplation. Someone wrote Dogen's total exertion Gu jin. I think that jin might be. Do you know what effort or energy is in Chinese, David? Jin. Yeah, right. I think the gu is total. I think shogin might be how virya parmita is translated. But that's a. That's a Japanese pronunciation, so I don't know what it is in Chinese. But anyway, this jin, but it says total exertion is not a matter of personal effort. What? I'm not making effort. Oh, it says, but as a dynamic, creative mode of existence where an individual act is inseparable from the entire universe. Well, that's the kind of effort our practice is talking about, no matter what the circumstance. This Bodhisattva response, a response that actually is boundlessly helpful and radically inclusive, has this quality of total exertion, a kind of joyous perseverance. Takes a lot to stay rooted, to have our roots in non separation, non division and non hatred. And truly caring and helpful response must be rooted in non separation. Because what's the most common popular root for human behavior in Buddhism? I know you all know it. Craving for more for less. It's a deep root for me and you and not me and not you. You know, just. It goes on forever. But the seeds of our practice nourish this other root of wholeness. And that's. That's where total exertion is grounded. This total exertion that's not a matter of personal effort, but is dynamic and creative and inseparable from the entire universe. So, you know, our Zen family style is full of stories. We started with the story, right? Buddha's parinirvana, who knows all the animals around. Cute elephant and wiggly things. We started with that story. So I'll end story that I think encourages total exertion. And it's written about probably many places that I have no clue about because a lot of it's in Chinese. But this is the hidden lamp. It's hidden lamp. Wonderful collection of stories from 25 centuries of awakened women. Believe it or not. There's a story of an old hag's total exertion, an old woman of the way. And I've talked about her before, but she's coming back because total exertion feels relevant. And I think that that's why I'm drawn to this old woman named Yu Dao Po, which means something like, I don't know, old woman of the way or something. Common term for nameless, enlightened women. I think this her way manifests these words. All conditioned things are prone to ceasing practice with diligence. Work out your own liberation. So you Dalpo was a donut seller, a street vendor. You know, I've been kind of mourning the disappearance of street vendors. You know, when I was young, there used to be more hanging out in Chicago. There's fewer and fewer, and then they get snapped up by the local military. So I'm going to just read the story because it's really short, and then I'll say a few words and then you'll be liberated to do a little temple cleaning and have some treats. There's some special treats for year of the horse Red bean mochi cake. I'm sorry, I can't give you any. But this is also kind of like Udalpo's donuts. So this is entitled Yu Yu Uses Her Full Strength. The lay woman Yu Dao Po made donuts for a living. She also studied Chan Chinese Zen with Master Longyou Weizhui, who told her to contemplate Rinzai's phrase, the true person of no rank. Kind of a famous story. Let's just not get too far into that. It's a whole other dozen talks. But she was married, so one day she and her husband were delivering some donuts, and they walked through the street and they met a beggar who was singing a little song in praise of the Lotus Land, which is like the Pure Land, you know, Namu Amida Butsu, that kind of thing. She heard the singing, so it's interesting. Here she is in Chon, which is a different sect than the Pure Land School, which is a devotional school. Typically, a kind of thought that this singing the song maybe, or chanting the name of Amita Butsu kind of guarantees you a quick exit out of this life into kind of a heaven after death, you could say. Very different than the tough school of Rinzai, you know, shouting and whatnot. You know, as a donut seller and a woman, she. I would fantasize she was illiterate, you know, she wasn't higher class in this culture, probably even lower. Was a beggar running around, street person who was singing. And suddenly she was enlightened and threw the tray of donuts to the ground. Her husband said, what, have you gone crazy? And she slapped him and said, this is not the Realm, you understand? And she just took off to go see her teacher, you know. And when she went to Lanya, he immediately acknowledged her awakening, right? So we always need somebody to witness and check things out, you know, A lot of times, like, I think I'm awakened, you know, Maybe all of our practice in life is verifying the awakening of people all the time, if we're lucky. But then she, you know, she barges into his assemblies. Like, imagine her coming running into this room, you know? And one day after this, in the assembly, Lanya asks the assembly, which one is the person of no rank? So she now has joined the assembly, and she shouts out, imagine that. It's kind of good actually, to sometimes, you know how, like, some people are like, I have to talk all the time during Question and Answer. And other people are like, I don't say anything. But sometimes, you know, in the middle of a dharma talk, if I was like, what is total exertion? And somebody shouts something out like this. There is a true person of no rank who has six arms and three heads. When she uses her full strength to cut, Flower Mountain is split into two. Her strength is like the ever flowing water, not caring about the coming of spring. That's it. There's a lot of imagery in here that we could just enjoy endlessly. Flower Mountain is this steep, venerated mountain. So cleaving this with total exertion, which has something to do with cutting through ego and the haze of our dualistic thinking and fixed views. And this total exertion is a liberate itself that can flow like water through anything. Or like Manjushri sword, cut through delusion. I'll say a little bit about the commentary because these are commentaries by contemporary practitioners. And a person named Kokyo. Meg Porter Alexander has this reflection. I'm just going to read a little bit of it. She says, 35. You know, I don't know if Kathy's here. Kathy might have met Meg Porter. Maybe she's not still here. Did you meet Meg Kathy or Meg Alexander? I'm sorry, Maybe. Yeah. On a yoga retreat someplace. Right. Tulum. Maybe Kathy, you want to tell us? [00:23:22] Speaker C: Yes. She and her husband, they were delightful, and he's a dentist. But I stubbed my toe and tore a big hole in it, and he helped me make sure it didn't get infected. I appreciate both of them very much. [00:23:39] Speaker B: Great. So we'll hear her words. But Tigen has a golden hand raised. So speak great teacher. Just that I know both Meg and Mark from way back. So, yeah, so a testimonial that Meg is a real person. So she says this. So of course, you know, Mega is one of these Zen center people, and it's a small, you know, group of New York review of each other's books kind of thing, you know, like we all know each other a little bit. But she reflects on this and says, 35 years ago, when I put on my black robe and headed to the mountain monastery of Tassajara, stories like this, although always of men, were an entry to Zen practice for me. Stories that made enlightenment something personal, embodied and radical. Total exertion. Most of us came to zen in the 70s. We were young and sincere. We were desperate to be comfortable with ourselves and at the same time determined to make a difference in the world. We brought all forms of suffering with us to the cushion, to the embrace of Suzuki Roshi's Teaching and with practice, through practice, something in us was transformed. The intensity of practice opened our senses and allowed us to hold our difficulties and cultivate our strength. When I read the story of you, I imagine a woman I might have known or been, someone needing to break open, someone prepared for the effort this would take. A woman whose heart, mind, responded deeply to a generous teacher. A teacher whose vision of Sangha was wide and inclusive. I think I don't need to say anything more, but this is our legacy. These are the stories we tell. And ah, this total exertion. Cleaving Flower Mountain was Yu's way. Not a matter of personal effort, but a dynamic, creative mode of existence where everything an individual does is inseparable from the entire universe. So how will you express it? Bodhisattvas, please offer your reactions or stories, questions and answers. I'm all in the room. I've got a month here. So. [00:26:34] Speaker D: So what is the realm that Bodhisattva need to be in order to have true exertion? [00:26:41] Speaker B: What is the realm? Yes, right here. Okay, this was a quick answer. Yeah, it's a pretty quick question too. Some other people gave some other people time to think about it. Very sincere question. But that realm also, I could elaborate on it, is this realm that's dynamic, creative and non. Dual. How about that for a start? Who will need a microphone from someplace [00:27:16] Speaker A: just to follow up and not at all to be cheeky. Sometimes this is sincere. Sometimes it seems like animals are bodhisattvas. And I'm wondering what realm they are in, if they are, you know, from the animal realm, but acting in a way that's perceived in the human realm. [00:27:36] Speaker B: I have no idea. I mean, animals are where they appear to us. I don't even know if they exist, you know, as maybe that, you know, as long as we don't see them as animals, we can see their bodhisattva. Nature and the bodhisattvas go to all realms. So we welcome the animals, the grieving elephant, the distance displaced and discontent Horse, the horse of fire and the worm that crawls on the earth. I think that's our practice. But don't be fooled by appearances, Jake. [00:28:19] Speaker E: As a sort of middle resonance between that and what you were saying, I'm reminded of. [00:28:26] Speaker B: Put me on the hot seat here. [00:28:28] Speaker E: Well, I'm just reminded of this story of a. A dog in Japan whose master went to work and like died. Like had a heart attack at work or something. And the dog for the rest of its life would go every day to the Train station to wait for its master to come home. And it just, you know, we have this bodhisattva animal who's putting forth this, like, full exertion, like he's, he's showing up. Or she. I don't know if it was a male or female dog, but yeah, just. [00:28:58] Speaker F: I don't know. [00:28:59] Speaker E: For some reason that rose up and I just wanted to share it. [00:29:01] Speaker B: It's a great story. It's a great story. And we can learn from these bodhisattva seeming animals, animal appearances. Just if I may interrupt, there's a statue of that dog in front of the station. Oh, you, you know that, you know that dog? Yeah. [00:29:25] Speaker F: Very, very. [00:29:26] Speaker B: There's a monument to the dog. Yes, yes. Is it wearing an OSA or, you know, it's just like a little dog picture. Okay. I actually, you know, we have some little plastic pictures of dogs and cats and stuff in Gasho. And I was going to put them on the altar, but I thought, oh, guess who's going, going crazy with ceremony. She's got to calm down, but maybe next year. Thank you. David. David. Ray Weiner. Sorry. David. [00:29:58] Speaker F: Yes, yes. [00:29:58] Speaker B: Ray. The other David. Yes. Yeah, sorry. [00:30:02] Speaker F: I love this story and thank you for it. And so I'm thinking about the, the flash, the, the outburst. [00:30:10] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:30:10] Speaker F: The moment of slapping the husband and dashing down the donut train. I love it. That, that raises a laugh is so interesting about, about anger. [00:30:19] Speaker E: Right. [00:30:19] Speaker F: I mean. Right. I think we live in a culture where sort of the, you know, the, the, the, the party line is that anger is always inappropriate, you know, and you need to go to anger management or whatever. I, I was for sure raised in, in a household where anger was, was expressed. And, you know, maybe that's, you know, in some ways it's negative because anger is out of control. But my mother very much said, look, it's really good to get things out in the open. It's very good to air. And I think over the years we both sort of got better at it. We both were very angry, outbursty kind of people when, when I was young and she was recently divorced, and we were both really scared. And so we both did anger, outburst. But this one seems different. [00:30:58] Speaker E: Right. [00:30:58] Speaker F: And I think our reaction to it signals that it's. That it's different. She didn't, she didn't freak out and get angry, but she did let some of that cuts that busts. That says, okay, okay, here we go. This is a, this is a new thing. It reminds me of a story from a philosopher that I'm. That I'm studying these days. Mencius, the Confucian, and one of these kings he deals with says, I got this problem. I'm really too fond of boldness. And he said, well, don't think of it that way. Be like the king who, with a single burst of anger, brought peace to the whole world. It's like if, you know, use that psychic energy in some way. So, but that's. That's complicated because neither does. [00:31:37] Speaker B: Neither. [00:31:37] Speaker F: Neither would it be awesome if Dao Yupo, you know, made it a sort of, you know, lifestyle of dashing things to the ground and slapping people. So it's complicated. [00:31:47] Speaker B: This is a great point. And I think sometimes, first of all, we have the precepts which can ground us a little bit, but sometimes we're not grounded. And, you know, I think you was also like, you know, stuck in a particular social location in her culture and maybe even had a fixed identity of herself. I'm a donut maker and a wife. And this is a rejection of saying, like, wait a minute. I want my whole true nature to be expressed, not to be confined. And sometimes, you know, it takes that kind of very strong energy. But in some ways, somebody's totally exerting themselves in a creative, dynamic way. The anger has a different resonance. Like you said, we could laugh. Then there's times when it's abusive. So, you know, it's a very. Like. David, I think, like you said, it's complicated. But also, sometimes, you know, coming here sitting zazen in the middle of our lives where we could be doing so many other things is a huge act going against the stream. And so this is that kind of energy. But, you know, let's. We don't need to be afraid of anger. Just understand it and explore it. It is very powerful. And I think in Zen practice, the energy that we have also that we create in community has a lot to it. So we are responsible to take care of it. So thank you for bringing that up, David. Ah, so an encore. Okay. [00:33:31] Speaker D: Did she mean, when she talked about the person of Noreng, did it mean that she was a person of Noreng and she still somehow reached her true self or realized her true self? Or she's talking about person of no rank that can recognize our ego and work with that, or both. But did she mean both? [00:34:09] Speaker B: I think we'll probably be pondering that question for a long time. I'll say there are two things going on, as I recall in this story. One, is this person of no rank symbolizing somebody who's gone beyond ego, maybe even emptiness. And then you have this other. What is it? Three headed six armed demonic figure representing the relative world and conceptual thinking. So I think we have this interplay between those two as part of it. And then of course, you know, the voluminous study of the person of Greg the Great Koan. So I think a lot is happening in that. I want to say also that that being of three heads and six arms, I think was understood to be like, you know, kind of like almost like a Greek godlike thing creature in Asura. But also I think that sometimes it represents the. An avatar of Manjushri and Wisdom. So I think there's this attempt to sort of not get stuck any place here. That's. That's how I would initially say it. But, you know, who am I to say, sit with you, Dalpo, and ask her that question? Yeah. Thank you very much, Emil. Ah, Libby, maybe last but not least, [00:35:40] Speaker G: I wanted to share my favorite anger story about that that I hold on to about that from Gwink, who's a Vipassana teacher, tells a story about his, about witnessing his teacher, he was assisting at a. At a meditation retreat in that tradition. And his teacher went in and they have these, in those retreats. They, they're in these little separate little cubbies where they're meditating separately. And so he, the teacher, this one meditator was slouching around and not really like taking it serious, you know, not in it. And so the teacher went in and let him have it and sort of, you know. Yeah. Like yelled it like sternly, you know, to wake him up and then came back to the other helpers of the, of the retreat and was sort of [00:36:33] Speaker B: like, wasn't that funny? [00:36:35] Speaker G: Like, like, sort of like that. Basically there was no, he wasn't attached. It wasn't like. It was like I summoned this intensity to help this person be. Wake up in this moment and. But it wasn't, it's not, it's not like I actually need them to be a different way or something in me is attached to that, you know, so this is a playfulness and. But it, so it occurred to me like. But that kind of. That's a, that's an advanced per. You know, that person's been. It's like it takes total exertion to be able to work with something as difficult as anger to the point where it could be of benefit. [00:37:18] Speaker B: Thank you, Libby. I'll just say maybe it doesn't take. Just someone who's been practicing a long time. Once in a while we stand up and say no. And you say that to a child, even if you're angry, to protect them, sometimes to get attention. And also sometimes there are teachers who think that it's just okay to. Because I'm enlightened, I can act any way I want. So this is a big challenge for us. However angry, happy, sad, deluded, we can always find this place of total exertion, of creativity, of improv that's based in non separation and connection and radical inclusivity and we might not even know we're doing it. So that's probably enough for today because I know people want to get a little snack and do some work. There's something in the chat, maybe somebody's saying goodbye. So I'm going to see if I can see it. Blake, thanks. Was just a thank you. You're very welcome. It's so much fun to be with everyone, but I think what's going to happen is I'm going to close my screen, we're going to chant the vows, I'm going to do some vows and then our Ina will make some announcements and we'll have work and tea. How's that? Thank you all very much. May our intention equally extend to every being and place with the true merit of Buddha's way Being are numberless we found. [00:39:37] Speaker E: Now.